It's the least dreadful time of the year,

With the kids whining and everyone sneering,

The holiday cheer, oh so austere,

It's the least dreadful time of the year.

There'll be much less singing,

And hearts won't be ringing,

No jingle bells jingling,

It's the least dreadful time of the year.

(Verse 2)

It's the time for some grumbling and growls,

And exchanging not-so-joyful scowls,

With those holiday scents that repulse,

It's the time for complaints and impulse.

(Chorus)

There'll be much less laughter,

And gifts won't come after,

No happy ever after,

It's the least dreadful time of the year.

(Bridge)

Everyone glumming,

And spirits all numbing,

In this season of humdrumming,

It's the least dreadful time of the year.

(Verse 3)

It's the time for less gathering near,

With awkward conversations and sneers,

No warmth, just a chill in the air,

It's the least dreadful time, if you dare.

(Chorus)

There'll be no snow glistening,

And no mistletoe kissing,

No joyous reminiscing,

It's the least dreadful time of the year.

(Outro)

So brace yourself, my dear,

For the least dreadful time of the year.